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I used to have the mentality that I SHOULD forgive EVERYONE; that everyone is deserving of at least another chance. I couldn’t have been more wrong. For emphasis purposes, let’s define the term “MISTAKE” first shall we?
mis•took (mĭ-stʊk’), mis•tak•en (mĭ-stā’kən), mis•tak•ing, mis•takes.
v.tr.
1. To understand wrongly; misinterpret:
2. An act or thought that unintentionally deviates from what is correct, right, or true:
So lets see…if a mistake is UNINTENTIONAL , it could not have been PREMEDIATED -> which means it may have not been POSSIBLE to FORSEE , or even AVOID from happening.
Given valid circumstances, these are forgivable.
It’s funny, I look at my past, and recall all the people I have forgiven. I realize that what I forgave them for, actually didn’t…no better yet, shouldn’t have happened…because it was in fact preventable. Friends don’t intentionally hurt friends. There is no such thing as an INTENTIONAL MISTAKE. There just isn’t. And to be quite frank? You can justify yourself with a hundred reasons, but now I’ll know better than to sympathize for you. I mean come on, after all,…on what obligatory means should I give a shit about you in the least, when my feelings were completely neglected as you did what u did, fully knowing how it would affect me.
Lets dissect this idea a little further:
Okay, so hypothetically speaking, what if some girl went to a friends birthday party, had one too many celebratory drinks, and ended up hooking up with some random guy (note: assuming this sloppy girl has a boyfriend). ANDDD just for shits and giggles, lets assume they’ve been exclusively dating for over a year, and never faced real obstacles that tested their relationship.
Is this excusable?
By definition , it was in fact UNINTENTIONAL, and it definitely couldn’t have been PREMEDIATED because she ended up with a total stranger. In all technicalities, she didn’t foresee this from happening.
[For all you anal retentive persons, I’m quite aware that its not all black and white, and is very circumstance-specific, but im discussing this in generalities to make a point; so save me the boredom of scrutinizing every little detail of this HYPOTHETICAL CIRCUMSTANCE]
The old naive quick-to-forgive-sujin would say yes (refer back to the fact that it was unintentional etc etc)
I’d like to say now that I would say no. But given the circumstances, I’d have to take many things into consideration. However I would realize that it’s unnecessary and VERY AVOIDABLE to prevent yourself from drinking excessively to the point where you lose judgment. THAT aspect of it is unforgivable (especially since it wasn’t your birthday, and that nobody was forcing you to drink) . I just don’t think using the excuse that you were high or intoxicated is a sound argument , since you willingly put yourself in that state. No one else should be to blame but yourself. FOR SHAME!! FOR! SHAME!
Anyways, I’m slowly losing my train of thought, and will continue on this post another day
-Suji
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